Love Should Be Multiplied, Not Divided

Okay... so most of you have probably heard of TLC's television series, Sister Wives, which centers around the life of polygamist, Kody Brown and his four wives, Meri, Jenelle, Christine, and Robyn... as well as their sixteen (soon to be seventeen) children. Until this show aired, I had a few misconceptions about polygamy; the first being that I thought nobody engaged in it anymore. Clearly I was wrong. And secondly, I thought that it was simply a lifestyle choice, but it turns out that it is a religion of its own; a faith and a belief in its truth and morality. That was news to me!

The Brown family, shown here.

On the show, many things are talked about: struggles with polygamy's legality, day-to-day struggles with raising nearly twenty children, jealousies that arise, and the desire to keep the faith strong in such a large family. The one thing that isn't talked about nearly as much, oddly, is the idea of polygamists being of their own religion, and until this past week's episode, the distinction was not made clear enough. FINALLY, they centered an episode around it. Kody took his whole family of twenty-one back to his hometown for a festival of sorts. It was here that we learned of Kody's former best friend, who struggled with their relationship after Kody converted from being LDS, like the rest of his friends.

That's right, folks: CONVERTED. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS) aka 'Mormons; ARE NOT the same as polygamists, who practice FUNDAMENTALIST Mormonism, essentially; which is absolutely a separate thing. The problem with the show up until this past week was that confusions arose when Kody kept referring back to his days growing up LDS and going on his mission from church. The fact that his parents converted and he followed along with them as a young adult was not made apparent enough. Therefore, some people, who weren't paying close enough attention to the show, may have been lead to believe that Kody was, in fact, still LDS. He is not. His friend told him on this past week's episode that his separation from the LDS church was not made a great enough distinction to break the stereotype that's been going on for years: that Mormons must still practice polygamy. They do not.

When the show first aired, I had concerns that this might be an issue: the confusion that could reinforce the stereotype. I feel as though now that has been broken (a bit) by the show and am now an even bigger fan of what the show entails. Religious stereotypes are just as bad as racial stereotypes, friends, so please remember that those jokes can have a sting to them too. When Scott and I first got engaged, rather than some ignorant people congratulating us, they would crack jokes about how many wives would be in the picture. That was incredibly rude and frustrating to me. Now, obviously, after I explained things to them, they felt foolish, so it's not an issue anymore, but it was an obstacle I had not run into before I decided to get married. Very few of us can pretend to know the full extent of a religion we don't belong to, so don't let any one stereotype lead you to believe you get it and have room to judge. Nobody does.

It's just the two of us... and we wouldn't want it any other way.

Anyway! That being said, if you've never seen Sister Wives, it's definitely worth watching. I, personally, could never be a polygamist, because of the jealousies that would arise. True, the Browns almost make it look easy and enjoyable, but that's television editing for you. Sure, it would be awesome to always have someone there to talk to and look after your children and to relate to and to be surrounded by children all the time (if you love kids), but the ugly green monster cannot be ignored! I understand why some people have moral objections to polygamy, but the fact is, it's a choice, just like anything else, and if this is the path that they truthfully believe in and that makes them happy, I say more power to them! Love is love.

"Love should be multiplied, not divided" Kody says on the show's intro. Whether you agree with the Browns or not, there are some beautiful life lessons they apply to their everyday life, this being one that we can twist to adapt to our own situations. Love should be multiplied, yes, but that doesn't have to pertain to marriage alone: you can multiply love by having children; you can multiply love by helping out those in need; you can multiply love by caring for pets; and you can multiply love by extending kindness to everyone you meet. Find a way to multiply love every day and you will find that love almost always finds its way back to you in a magnitude that you could never expect. In other words, spread the love!!

Thanks for letting me go where I haven't gone before,

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